Why am I such an idiot? Why am I such a fool and life doesn’t teach me why I am the way I am now

Men of all times and peoples have guessed that female psychology is a mysterious and inexplicable thing. Every representative of the fair sex from time to time asks herself this sacramental question, why am I such a fool?

The wording may change, but the meaning will never change! The girl reproaches herself for some actions, remembering in detail what happened on that ill-fated day.

Who is to blame and what to do? Why am I such a fool? Should you blame yourself for something and constantly call yourself a fool?

Why am I such a fool or female psychology

The woman begins to engage in self-flagellation, trying to prove to herself that everything invented is actually true. Is there any way to avoid all of the above?

Certainly! You just need to get out of the imagined reality as soon as possible and you can safely think through this situation.

Psychologists say that most of the fair sex actually behave like fools quite often. Can we say that this happens to every woman?

Of course, you can’t do without this. Like a wave that literally covers your head and it’s unlikely that you’ll be able to emerge immediately. What does it take to come to your senses? Of course, time is the engine of progress.

It is worth looking for an answer to the question: why am I such a fool? Or why are all women stupid? This is probably determined at the genetic level.

Women cannot think logically, they live by emotions. While a man can soberly assess the situation, a woman will not be able to immediately find her bearings.

You shouldn’t make quick decisions, they obviously won’t be rational. Here, rather, it’s the other way around; a quick decision made will soon have a detrimental effect on your life.

Women's psychology in love and relationships

1. JEALOUSY

Giving other beautiful girls admiring glances is the nature of men. There's nothing wrong with that.

If there is harmony in your relationship and you are confident in yourself and your companion, there is no reason for fear, and he will not cheat on you.

Perhaps your loved one is deliberately making you jealous. Understand that if he really decided to cheat on you, he will do everything so that you don’t find out about it.

Therefore, his communication with another girl in front of you is not a sign of his readiness to cheat.

Jealousy is fraught with enormous destructive potential. It will gnaw at you from the inside like a worm and can be fatal to your relationship.

If you do have to deal with your man’s infidelity, don’t take it personally. And you shouldn’t be tormented by the question, why am I such a fool?

This is his mistake, a consequence of the fact that initially your relationship developed according to the wrong scenario. Dealing with the betrayal of a loved one is hard, but imagine how much harder it would be if things went even further?

2. YOU FORGET ABOUT YOUR LOVED’S PRIVATE SPACE

You should not try to find out what is not directly reported. Men are much more closed creatures than women.

They are not ready to talk about their problems. They are more accustomed to experiencing everything within themselves and trying to eliminate the difficulty that has arisen on their own.

There is no need to “get under your skin” every time your partner is “out of sorts.” There are times when a person simply needs to be alone, to organize his thoughts and feelings.

3. YOU ARE ALREADY RELAXED

This is the most common reason why a man leaves for another woman or decides to cheat. A girl always needs to take care of herself.

Having a permanent partner does not mean that you can forget to take care of your appearance. On the contrary, your loved one should not doubt the correctness of the choice made and rejoice at every meeting.

4. THE MEANING OF YOUR LIFE IS IN IT

This is a terrible mistake a woman makes. Try, if possible, to fill your life with significant events, work, social life, communication with friends, do whatever you want, but do not turn a person into the meaning of your life.

Otherwise, sooner or later he will feel it and begin to take you for granted. As soon as he gets bored with your endless love and care, he will leave you.

5. OMISSIONS

Everyone has problems, and when he sees that something is wrong with you, he begins to wonder about the reason for your bad mood.

If you really don't want to discuss it, then try not to show that you're in trouble. However, when you answer his question about what happened, “Nothing,” but at the same time expect him to continue his questions, then you are doing the wrong thing.

This behavior is typical for almost all girls and it terribly infuriates men. This may lead to the fact that once again he simply will not be interested in your problems.

He won't want to extract every word from you. And then, again, the question will come to myself, why am I such a fool?!

6. EXCESSIVE NICTION

There are no perfect people in this world and your idea of ​​who should be with you will never correspond to reality. You need to come to terms with this!

It is permissible to slightly correct the behavior of your lover, but this should be done carefully, for example: “Beloved, I love it so much when you…. It upsets me so much when a person..."

It is worth noting that you-statements with a positive connotation are perceived well, but you should not use them to discuss your complaints. They automatically push your interlocutor towards confrontation with you.

7. YOU DO NOT APPRECIATE HIM.

Stop focusing on what was done, was done wrong, or wasn’t done at all. Praise him for what was done for you and for your sake.

In the modern world, it is not customary to praise men, but this does not mean that they do not need warm, sincere words at all. This will allow you to be treated with more understanding and love.

On a subconscious level, a woman often turns a blind eye to basic things: is her man flirting with another person? She will pretend that nothing is happening, but the man will think that she is a fool.

Is it possible not to notice obvious things? It turns out that it is possible, you just need to look at the situation from a completely different angle and everything will immediately fall into place.

Gullible and naive girls can also be called fools, because in modern society you cannot be a fool, you will definitely be “eaten.”

In fact, you don’t need to ask yourself obsessive questions and reproach yourself with why I’m such a fool. Real fools never ask why they are fools.

Sooner or later, the mostly rhetorical question “Why am I such a fool?” every girl can ask herself. Rather, it is not so much a question as a kind of emotional projectile fired into itself, carrying various semantic “fillings.” For example, one of the options for decoding “Why am I such a big fool?” in human language it may turn out: why do girls sometimes commit inappropriate actions and what motivates them in this situation? In this article we will try to answer this difficult question.

As you know, anything can be a reason for indignation: from falling in love with a completely unworthy person, to yet another purchase of expired cosmetics “at a 50% discount.”

Reason #1: “Love”

There is no doubt that a woman in love has practically no chance to think adequately, which in itself transfers her to the status of a real fool. After all, if everything is fine and the chosen one turned out to be a worthy man, then the question “why am I such a fool?” will not arise. But if he shattered all your dreams, turning out to be the most ordinary drunkard, womanizer, lazy, scoundrel, miser, spendthrift (underline as appropriate), but inside you still continue to adore him - at this emotional junction, bewilderment arises: “Well, that’s why Am I such a hopeless fool?

The solution to this situation is simple, but it is quite difficult to implement - immediately stop loving. As soon as the influence of the magical spell of the merciless Cupid leaves you, along with the illusion of unfulfilled dreams, at the same moment the ability to think soberly will return and the content of the question will change to the opposite: “Why am I such a fool, how could I love such a person?” The most important thing is not to worry about this, but to avoid such a mistake in the future.

Reason #2: “Herd instinct”

Women, like no one else, are subject to this instinct, especially when it comes to buying cosmetics, clothes, perfume and other purely feminine nonsense. More serious decisions in the sphere of relationships can also be included in this category: you urgently need to get married, since almost all of your girlfriends are already married; I urgently need to give birth, because all my girlfriends have been with children for a long time; urgently move up the career ladder because everyone wants it, etc.

As a result, this is another reason to ask yourself “why was I born such a fool?” You have a severe allergy to the cream you bought on the advice of a friend, the dress you bought on a super promotion looks terrible on you, your child and husband are not at all happy, and managing a team is not your nature. “Lord, why am I always such a fool?” - you sigh in despair, thinking about wasted years/money/effort.

What should I do? Stop regretting what is no longer there and regret what is still left, but may go away if you don’t change anything. In everything, rely solely on your opinion (if you don’t have one, decide on it urgently!), build priorities in your own life and do not let anyone’s opinion or example put pressure on the decision you make.

Reason No. 3: “Unfortunate heredity”

Sadly, but, as a rule, female stupidity tends to be inherited. If a mother constantly asks the question “why am I such a fool?”, then it’s no wonder that over time her daughter will begin to exclaim in her hearts: “Why did I grow up to be such a fool?” It's rare for a stupid mother to have a smart daughter. And it often happens that a daughter’s “young mistakes” are very reminiscent of her mother’s. As they say, you can't go against genes.

If you feel like the question “why am I such a fool all the time? will haunt you all your life, try not to get rid of your certain naivety, but, on the contrary, use your “unsuccessful” nature for your own benefit. As wise women say, the ability to pretend to be weak, stupid and defenseless is exactly what disarms a man and helps him achieve any task. Listen to them, and success will surely come to you!

Well, who among us does not experience moments in life when we want to burn with shame, crawl into a dark crevice, cover our heads with a pillow, dissolve or turn into a molecule invisible to someone else’s eye? When the only thought is beating and groaning in your head: “Well, why am I such a fool?!” Why, why did I get drunk yesterday and call this indifferent, heartless brute, this womanizer (I was stupid at a meeting, put on that stupid dress that cracked on my ass, took it and crashed the car)?

Comfort yourself! You're not the only one. The sacramental question “why am I such a fool” is asked to Yandex by 15 thousand unfortunate people every month. Just imagine how many of these people haven’t yet thought to ask a search engine, and they channel their beloved girlfriends, mothers, and cats?

Thanks to Michal Mikhalych Zhvanetsky, who is able to explain the essence of things in a nutshell, we all know that there are two types of women: “Lovely, what fools” and “Horrible, what fools.” Penetrating deeper and pushing, so to speak, the boundaries of imagination, let's try to expand this range. After all, there is no limit to perfection, especially in this matter, isn’t it?
An ordinary fool or just a fool
You can find it everywhere: at work, in a nearby store, in your own entrance, even on your page in Odnoklassniki. An unremarkable creature that never expresses its opinion out loud and tries to sneak past you unnoticed. Accidentally looking into her transparent gray eyes, hiding in her fluffy eyelashes, I want to say: “Is anyone home?” And at home she has a beloved husband and children, and lace napkins on the windowsill under each flower. Well, what a fool!

Terrible fool (Fool, just terrible!)
She pretends to be a “pretty little fool.” Her motto: “Nothing makes a woman look better than hydrogen peroxide.” The presence of wild fleece is a must. The preferred lipstick color is blood red. Clothes – bright. Clothing style – eclectic, i.e. complete disharmony, in fact, in the head too. For drinks, he prefers strongly brewed tea, sipped with a mouthpiece. He smokes exclusively strong cigarettes. As a rule - lonely. “Oh, I’m so lonely!..” God forbid you show interest in her, you will be “loved” to death. Run away, leaving scraps of your clothes and buttons in her tenacious fingers while they are still intact.

Stupid or City Crazy
Her manner of dressing distracts her from the desire to determine the real age of this specimen. A clever move, for those who understand. Her fashion is timeless and beyond competition, because no one but her thought of sewing a new green collar, crocheted with her own hands, onto a ten-year-old coat. The lady is always with a dog of the same unknown breed and age. Well-read, intelligent, unobtrusive. She is never seen in connections that discredit her.

Impossible fool (size matters)
The vastness of her form, coupled with the height of a grenadier, a loud voice and a peremptory manner of saying loudly and out loud absolutely impossible things, blows away everything within a radius of three meters. One gets the impression that her great-grandfather was Lieutenant Rzhevsky himself. If you need to make a positive impression on someone, take it with you. For contrast, so to speak.

Stupid (aka Stupid)
Hair color changes twice a week, from bright blue to soothing soft pink. Although, I’ve hardly heard of Picasso. Clothing style is casual. Makes contact easily and naturally. It turns out the same way, since few people understand her Martian dialect. He smokes, and not just cigarettes. Incomplete secondary education, at best - courses in nail extensions. Not a tramp, right?

A complete fool (with completed higher education)
The craving for knowledge and conquering new universities comes down to collecting educational diplomas, which she will never have to use for their intended purpose. Let it be. She likes the process itself, and let the horses do the work. For a complete fool there is no limit to self-improvement. Often, they become regulars at psychiatric clinics due to mental overstrain. In general, - grief from the mind.

Refined fool (poetess)
He writes poetry and bursts out with his “masterpieces” to anyone who happens to be at hand. He runs his own poetry blog, which is visited by enthusiastic and equally crazy graphomaniacs. She loves to sing opera arias in the shower in a high and shrill voice, imagining herself as Sarah Brightman. She dreams of making someone happy, for example, marrying a famous producer, living in Bali and painting watercolors from life. In general, something like this.

Soulful fool (virtue itself)
She is always ready to come to the rescue and save the world, even if in the person of a neighbor who demands twenty for his hangover. She feeds all the cats in the area, which is why in the already shabby and dirty entrance, the “amber” and relations with neighbors are appropriate. Her vest is wet from the tears of those suffering for help. She has sincere friendship with men, even with those who once decided to sleep with her.

Beautiful fool (hare, me)
It is all created from poses, smiles, voice timbre and gestures, repeatedly practiced in front of the mirror. Her simple, but silent and graceful movements around the office attract attention and act hypnotically. Such a beautiful thing will decorate not only the office, but also the vacation of a bored businessman looking for a charming travel companion for a trip to the United Arab Emirates for a couple of weeks.
Classic fool (yes, yes!)
This character seemed to be lost in the pages of Russian classics. But no, he is still alive today. Or rather she. She is amorous, dreamy and selfless, like Turgenev’s young lady. For an “outburst of unbridled passion for a subject” to occur, insurmountable obstacles to it are required. Otherwise it’s boring and uninteresting. Experiences - every time, like the first time. With accompanying suicidal escapades.

Professional fool (clown)
They are taught in circuses, as well as in cultural and educational schools. Their profession is to fool and entertain the masses. Professionally. They can be found among the leading entertainment television shows, in KVN and comic programs on TV. They are not afraid to be funny and absurd, because this is their profession. Why be ashamed?

This classifier of fools and their subtypes can be continued indefinitely. And the further we delve into the study of this subject, the more copies can be discovered and immortalized in this register. So don’t torment yourself with the question “why am I such a fool.” You are not a fool! It's just that you are a woman. And women are allowed sweet feminine stupidities, even if these stupidities are limitless. This is why they love us.

How naive I am! I didn’t attach any importance to his flirtations with my friend, his “friendly” kisses and greetings with her. And so at the party he retired with her on the balcony, and when I came out to them, he said that they were just talking. After the party, he said that he needed to see her off because she lived far away. Now he’s dating her... But I could have stopped this flirting right away, but for some reason I closed my eyes. Why am I such an idiot?

“I told him his mom talks too much. He was offended. Why did I tell him this?

“I was turning, and at that time the phone rang. I started rummaging through my purse, and the steering wheel suddenly began to swerve, and I ended up ramming a car parked on the sidewalk. What kind of idiot am I?"

Many girls, reproaching themselves for some missteps or mistakes, often, as they say, “tear their hair out” and engage in self-flagellation: why did I turn out to be such a fool? What an idiot! After all, all this could have been prevented if...

But do you really feel, to put it mildly, rather weak in the head? If you ask yourself this question, then you are no longer an idiot, because otherwise you would not do this. But sometimes mistakes are actually made, as they say, “stupidly”: due to neglect of some rules or instructions. Such mistakes happen to all people, regardless of their gender.

Sometimes women don’t seem to see the “art” of their chosen ones. Everyone knows that he is deceiving her with someone else, but she, the fool, does not notice. Does he really not see? Or does he prefer to close his eyes so as not to end the relationship? That's another question.

But more often the cause of troubles that make women regret and exclaim - what an idiot I am! - is simply a feature of the psychology of women, forcing them to react differently to certain events than men. It is no secret that women are more emotional than men, and outbursts of emotions make it difficult to adequately assess the situation - this is only possible in a calm state.

In extreme situations, men show more restraint than women, and therefore their decisions and actions are more correct. Yes, women are emotional, that's a fact. But the fact is that they have a special intuition, unlike men, that allows them to guess many things and make the right decisions. So is it worth beating yourself up so much? Self-flagellation is a destructive feeling. When a person constantly blames himself for something, he becomes less capable, including of positive activity, of correcting mistakes. So don't dwell on the negative. “Oh, I’m such an idiot!” Instead, try to calm down and learn from your mistake. And you will learn how to be more positive

From the thought “why am I not like everyone else?” I want to bury myself in a pillow and not go out into the outside world. How to stop thinking that you are “not of this world”? Why are some people considered “black sheep” and how not to become a gray mass? If the feeling of your own uniqueness prevents you from living freely, this article is dedicated specifically to you. What can you do for personal happiness by establishing relationships with others? Read to the end and you will no longer experience the “outsider” syndrome.

Why am I the way I am now?

You go out into the street and frankly understand that all these people seem to be strangers to you. The feeling of alienation accompanies you on the way to work, in the shopping center, on the train. How to live with your uniqueness syndrome without feeling discomfort? If a person realizes that he does not fit into the generally accepted framework, he may be haunted by fears in communication and indifference to everything mediocre. How to remain yourself, but not go into your inner world of ideals?

When you think “I am who I am and let them think that I am an alien from another world”- it only drives you into a blind corner. Sometimes a girl with a non-standard appearance by nature becomes hostage to complexes. What can I say, even a person with thoughts about something Higher, unattainable, no longer fits into the usual framework. Non-standard habits, inner world - this is not a reason to strive to become like everyone else, but a reason to think about relationships with others.

Why am I so spiritual, and they are all selfish and limited by the idea of ​​wealth? Values ​​come to the fore. It is from them that everyone starts and builds their image in society. People set priorities on which they depend. Here comes a guy with an athletic build and an unshakable facial expression on his face. And here is another lady with a sullen grimace who is rude to her friend. And you go all so positive, thinking “why am I so special and can enjoy every moment, but they seem to consist of emptiness.”

The ability to recognize the psychology of every passerby, to perceive the world around in its true colors - this is all the pursuit of truth. The philosophy of detachment from all this gray mass sometimes makes a person an outcast. He himself suffers from this thought, but cannot understand how to use his potential.

A woman with albino syndrome is forced to wear a long cape that protects her from ultraviolet radiation. She just can’t get on the transport because everyone is staring at her and taking pictures. She feels uncomfortable in the company of colleagues, and she was hardly hired. What can I say, she is afraid to start a relationship, because she thinks that no one will love me either.

How to accept yourself in your true form and strives to break through a window into life? It is important to let go of the pain, to be able to thank the offenders, because they provide the necessary experience. The events experienced allow a person to either resign himself to fate and continue to suffer, or to value his “trick” and be able to present it. It is important for a person like this woman and millions of other people to realize that they are not alone. Why not think “I am who I am and I can’t do anything about it, which means I’ll stop blaming myself for it”?

Am I not like everyone else or how to live in harmony?

Someone considers himself a “black sheep,” then how to determine this? There are special signs:

• People call such a person strange and try to avoid contact with him as much as possible. A person sometimes experiences similar problems from childhood or adolescence.
• As a child, the child had unusual behavior, so his parents tried to re-educate him. Because of this, self-doubt is formed.
• Some people live isolated from society for a long time. When the time comes for socialization, they cannot find an approach even in the most ordinary things.
• “White Crows” strive to hide their own potential in order to reduce criticism in their direction. Their talent has not been used for many years, and they experience internal pain.
• At an early age, a person was humiliated in every possible way and shown as a laughing stock. Over time, this resentment grew into selfishness and unwillingness to understand other people.
• The individual has fundamentally dropped out of the system and does not want to return to it. She cares less about the physical world than the spiritual world, and in her environment there are only the “chosen ones.”

I'm not like everyone else and how can I live with this? Everyone can experience episodes in life when you are unlike others. It is enough to give an example of a person with a subtle spiritual nature. If there is rudeness and moral pressure from the outside, then such a person simply withdraws into himself. It is important for him to find understanding, to live creatively, but he is squeezed into strict boundaries, and he rushes from corner to corner like a cornered animal.

It is best to give an example of the story of one girl. She is now 35 years old, and from the age of 17 she began to feel deep envy of others. “Why am I so ugly, I don’t have enough money, they are smarter than me, they are respected?” All these “whys” pierced her soul and gave her no peace. She saw the world as perfect, but lowered herself to the level of insignificance. It became difficult for her to express herself among her friends; she went to meetings less often so as not to suffer needlessly. The thought “I’m disgusting and they’re beautiful, I’m poor and they’re rich” drove her to despair. Everything was aggravated by the reluctance of people to be with her and the difficulties in finding a romantic relationship.

One day she dared and wanted to talk about it with her mother. She burst into tears and asked “what should I do?” The parent’s answer opened her eyes: “Don’t build unattainable ideals, start loving yourself in your true form.” On this day, the heroine called an old friend and persuaded her to go shopping with her. A couple of hours later, the girl tried on outfits that she had only seen on glamorous beauties. After that, she went to a beauty salon and changed her hairstyle. As a result, in the mirror she saw not a “gray mouse” with a blank look, but a spectacular brunette with sparkling eyes.

You need to follow your dreams and not deceive yourself with stupid templates. Find mutual understanding, say confidently “I’m not like everyone else, but I appreciate it.” Here are some quick tips to help you get out of the vicious circle:

• Stop being a victim. The hunter immediately notices a hunted deer and does not want to let go. In a team, family, with friends, it is important to be on an equal footing with others. A confident person becomes valuable to others, and his opinion is taken into account.
• Value personal space. How to avoid being a scapegoat? Do not allow others to get into your personal space and make their own rules there! Boundaries exist everywhere, and if someone claims your freedom, such people need to be avoided or made clear.
• Be able to forgive others. Relatives, colleagues, anyone can unknowingly escalate the situation. It’s worth letting go of all resentment and not dwelling on the negative. If those around you understand that you don’t care about their behavior, they will stop working for the public.
• Take responsibility for yourself. The world is beautiful, but the people in it are not always a gift. It is important to establish harmony with your environment and build personal happiness with all your might. You cannot expect exceptions from fate. The desired result comes only through conscious actions.

Congratulations! You have taken a short course in “why am I so special or how to live in harmony.” The article is based on the real experience of thousands of people who were able to find use for their uniqueness. You can pretend to be normal all the time, but suffer from silence all your life. It is important to accept ourselves and be grateful for everything we have. Take care of yourself and don't worry about trifles!